Follow the Peace
There are many things in life tugging at us from all sides, vying for our attention.
How do we know what to focus on and what to let go of?
I've come to find the simplest of answers holds true for the best fruit delivery in my own life. You may not agree and that's okay. But it's this.
Follow the peace.
I don't know about you but I am done with trying to juggle too much. I've outgrown my old wineskin. It tried to hold too much.
Pleasing everyone outside my home was how I lived for too many years and no wonder I was losing my mind while my house was crumbling.
We were becoming the family I never wanted to be; the one where a parent served others more than the ones under their noses (or above--I'm short).
The ones that become resentful because they were getting dragged to and fro, all the while the to and fro-ing not really helping any of us grow on the inside.
Some people may like to come and go and need healthy doses of physical exertion and intermingling, but our family works best when we have a lot of quiet time to think and create.
I will even go so far as to say, I prefer cleaning and cooking over getting out. It brings me peace knowing I am putting my time and attention where it helps our family flourish.
But it wasn't always this way.
There were years of too many yeses and scared to say no's because I thought I would be a bad friend or unholy if I dug my heel in and admitted, "I can't. Not this time."
The thing about going years with not speaking up is that it takes a while to unlearn some things, and just as long to work your muscle into a place where it's strong enough to withstand all the wants of the world.
Because we will have to say no.
We can't cave all the time.
I might as well remind you this isn't about selfishly self-serving.
This is me talking to me a few years ago.
To the mom drowning in the name of Jesus, just minus the disciple-making.
Or maybe there were some times sprinkled in there. God knows there probably was.
But I've longed for the lifestyle where I am not knee-knocking and always apologizing.
Living in my skin, being comfy with who I am.
Unashamedly declaring where we are as a family, without overexplaining and not feeling bad about it.
I've waited to write about our special needs family because I know when it's out there, it's out there.
Our story is, we pretty much look "normal" from the outside, but our challenges are unseen. And when challenges are unseen, it can be easy for people to assume all is typically all well.
Combine unseen special needs with really dependable people and you get a recipe for secret burnout. I am raising my hand and have been there a few times. I don't care to stay in the cycle, so this is me putting our story out there.
Maybe it will help you. Because maybe like us, your family's needs seem extreme most days and you long to say no to all the things others seem important, traditional, and exciting.
Well, friend, I am here to grab you gently by the shoulder and tell you that what is truly non-negotiable is your inner world.
If you know what your family needs in order to thrive.
I'm talking spirit led living, even when it doesn't make sense to others, then do it.
It if's the way--peace-fruit yumminess--then do it.
Follow the peace.
Because Peace is a person who desperately loves you and knows you better than you know yourself.